Thursday, March 12, 2009

Dear Mr. Deployment, yes this ones for you.

Dear deployment,

thanks to you I picked out brand new couches, yes brand new couches and the sofa just broke on me, yes it just broke. The furniture company didn't believe me that it just happened, because they didn't believe me they didn't want to come out to my house to exchange it. Of course, if that man I married were home I wouldn't have to call the furniture company to come exchange it, cause he would have done it without hesitation. It would have been just another funny episode in our newly married life. But he wasn't here. Thanks to you I killed a bug today, yes that's right deployment I killed a bug. I didn't scream, cry or run out of the room. Because there was no man in the house to run to. Just a flip flop laying next to the bed. So I picked the flip flop up and just killed the intruder. Deployment, thanks to you my health insurance, bank accounts and everything else that involves banking and insurance is all messed up. So was my husbands pay check. Things that I never even heard of are all screwed up. And of course there is nothing that I can do about it. Thanks to you deployment I cooked a meal for one today. The thing is, there was still more than enough for two on the stove. So I put the rest in tupperware, and cried. I knew crying wouldn't mean no knock on the door. I knew it wouldn't mean him sitting next to me at the table. But I cried anyway. Thanks to you my bedtime has gone from 10 pm to somewhere between 2 and 5 am. I barely know what it means to sleep anymore. Because when I do finally lay down at night, my bed is cold and lonely. And Tylenol PM is no substitute for a goodnight kiss. Yes I know. This is the life I chose to live. This life full of goodbyes, and being alone. In the corner of my mind a voice told me that as soon as he walked away anything and everything would fall apart. (Honestly though, I didn't expect our brand new furniture to break! That was a total surprise). I knew I would have to face things that would challenge me. I knew I would have to step up and be the man and woman of the household. Taking care of two cars, getting the oils changed, checking the fluid and doing annual maintenance has bettered me. But nothing could have prepared me for all the stuff that I'm learning or how much I've grown in the 2 months he's been gone. In these two months I've handled things that I never knew I could. Deployment, thanks to you I've become a stronger person, woman and wife. So thanks for everything deployment.

I'd like my husband back now.

Sincerely, a very proud USN wife.

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